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Silver She and Me

Posted on April 1, 2025March 29, 2025 by Editor-In-Chief
Yasmine Modaresi (she/her) // News Editor

I saw my reflection looking back at me, disappointed. 

Reflection me, silver she behind the glass me was the actualized me, the ideal me, the best of me— a figment of dream me.

Myself beside the silver glass she– mad me, hysterical me, insane me, was not she. 

My ways preserved, unquivering and chronic frazzled chaos— ugly.

Her, a tranquil, composed, sane beauty.

Madness is the lover of genius— the muse of creativity.

But admiration for such turbulence falters when the exotic mania of madness is a black cloak,

shrouding the persona of depravity within.

Yet I press my hand to hers, 

Clammy warm, flesh brushed against inanimate cold,

Blatantly divided yet unified, a yin and yang of bliss and suffering.

Me, the hollow-eyed shell of life despite a rhythmically beating heart of lifeforce stamina,

Her, vibrant as a deity of fertility on spring solstice, yet only a hallucination of livelihood.

Does she pity me? 

Surely, for she is the me that I could never achieve.

The figment of a dream me gazes unquiveringly at me— me, unactualized me— drinking me, detesting me, pitying me, 

Gaze radiant as a throbbing star, 

Near in proximity but separated, off light years away.

Me, a wandering ember, lost in a smoke cloaked labyrinth,

Ash clinging to my mortal skin like a mocking prophecy.

Hand pressed hard atop shattering glass, 

If I stepped through, would I kill the despised me? The real me? Become the dream me?

The Oroborus devours and destroys itself, a sacrifice and a renaissance,

Resurrected anew only through ritualistic suicide.

Category: Literature

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