Goodbye popping Tide Pods, yodelling children, Ariana Grande’s Thank U, Next and pictures of eggs.
Just about the only thing predictable about 2018 trends was their complete and utter obscurity. So here you go folks, the Courier’s very own obscure trend predictions for 2019:
Bow to the Brow
Greta Kooy, News Editor
The last 100 years has shown our furry forehead friends some pretty interesting trends: the 1920s brought us the delicate, thin brow and in the 50s it was all about the arch. Fast forward to the mid-2000s and things have gotten thicker again, but we’ve trended back and forth between the ‘framed skinny’ and the ‘bushy bold’ for years. That is, until the dawn of the age of Instagram.
Thanks to the social media sphere, we’ve seen everything from eyebrow accessories like jewellery, colourful gels and patterns to new fill techniques. Feathery-textured arches have gotten bigger, and trends like the “wavy brow”, the “barbed wire brow” and the “lightning bolt brow” have become increasingly aggressive.
2019, however, will be different. Makeup fiends worldwide will be stripping down and going bare, saying goodbye to their favourite brow pomades and definers and replace it with something that’ll have them singing “I’m your Venus, I’m your fire”.
That’s right folks, the no-brow is on the way. This sleek, minimal look will have you asking if it’s Maybelline or Gillette, and is reserved only for those who are completely out of this world. If you’re still on fence, just think about how much time it’ll save you in the morning.
Early Bird Special
Megan Orr, Opinions Editor
Forget avocados, 2019 boasts something for those of us with a more delicate and daring palate. This year all of the coolest gastro-tasting-fusion-trendsetting restaurants will be featuring rich samplings of different earthworms.
Inspired by the classic wine tasting style, worm tastings will focus on the different textures, scents and flavours brought out in the worms through the different soils of their regions. Hence why these particular delicacies will require those with a very fine palate to denote the subtle, yet entirely complex differences between the rare Champagne worm of France and your common garden worm from the valley.
Although not for the faint of heart, since the worms do have to be eaten alive and squirming to get the full effect, there is already secret waitlists for the foodie elites at nearly every Michelin star restaurant around the world. Prices vary depending on the experience. For a local sampling of five worms, the price is set from $35-65, for an international sampling, prices range from $70-$110. For $120+, a sommelier will pair each sampling with a tasting of different raw animal milks.
This trend is not to be missed. For the brave foodies among us, you will have to wait until late spring when the grounds thaw to see this popping up on menus, but you heard it here first. If you really want to be taken seriously, you should start digging and get your practice in now – after all, the early bird gets the worm.
Get That Max Tread
Freya Wasteneys, Features Editor
It’s been a little while since OutKast taught us that the only thing cooler than being cool is… well, being ice cold. But despite this age-old wisdom that has been hollered incessantly at nightclubs and proms since 2002, it seems that Vancouver is only just starting to pick up what André 3000 was putting down.
It took until 2019 for Vancouverites to even begin to comprehend why snow has such a hype, and as weird and unpredictable weather descends on the city best known for being mild, snow tires are going to become the new bling.
We won’t just settle for all-season tires. Oh no. These days it’s all about that max tread. The rubber compound on winter tires is softer than that of their counterparts, and they promise to grip the road and hug those curves as you shake it-shake-shake-shake-shake it on your way to work or school. If you have a big truck or an SUV equipped for all seasons, just know that your coolness is degrading by a factor of ten with each not winter-ready tire.
At this point you might say STOP! But if you only have all-season tires, you won’t stop. So instead, hit the road in style and enjoy the satisfaction you are bound to feel when you don’t slide through an intersection, and grin in the knowledge that your parents won’t ban you from the roads when the first snowflake sticks. Hey now fellas. Hey now ladies.
From the Depths of Laziness
Christine Beyleveldt, Editor-in-Chief
Diets go in and out of fashion. Thankfully the diet of ingesting laundry detergent didn’t last long in 2018, but the keto diet took off like a rocket from its launch pad last year and shows no signs of slowing down just yet. In 2019 however, it’s either going to continue on its current popularity streak or come crashing down like the meteorite that killed the dinosaurs. But, from the depths of human laziness, comes a new diet trend that will extinguish all else.
Maybe you forgot to eat breakfast, or maybe you’re… intermittent fasting! This year, we’re all going to adopt it. It’s never been cooler to forget a lunch, or be student poor. It’s actually going to be cool to not eat, and not just because that salad costs $9.
Say goodbye to counting calories, counting carbs or counting steps – if we must keep counting, let’s count down the seconds until our next meal.
Chartwells is already a step ahead of the game. Closing the cafeteria at 2 pm on Friday? It isn’t because nobody’s on campus, it’s because our fasting windows will be closed and they’re just preparing us to adopt the latest dieting craze. If you don’t know what an 18/6 means yet – and no, that’s not hours of studying to hours of sleep – you will soon enough. That said, at what point is it considered fasting? I haven’t eaten in about 20 minutes.
Fashion Backward
Clarissa Sabile, Contributor
Fanny packs make me feel obligated to applaud literally anyone that could manage to fit more than three things into one. Barrette hair clips and their contribution to my early hair loss as a six-year-old (when my mom lovingly ripped them out of my scalp) shall forever be on my mind. I’m familiar with the highlighter-neon and reflective fits (you should recall the time where wearing a matching set of clothes were looked down upon). And, apparently the vibrant, colourful tie dye print is making a return from my awkward, pre-pubescent camp days, disguised as à la mode.
As an Urban Outfitters sales associate, I spend shifts unpackaging (and criticizing) new products. Sadly, most of the time fashion crazes leave much to be desired as trends continue to pay direct homage to the 90s and early 2000s.
The mixture of preceding and modern fashion and hype trend pieces from unreachable high-end brands like Supreme, Balenciaga and Gucci are, unfortunately, still robbing teenagers of their credit card privileges. I hate to say it, but 2019 is still looking backwards for stylistic inspiration….
When will trends face forward? I want never-before-seen futuristic fads like metallic colour tones, abstract shapes and symbols… but I’m not in fashion school for a reason.
