Saying ‘see you later’ to one of CapU’s most treasured teachers.
Jordan Tomlinson (he/him) // Humour Editor
Jasmin Linton (she/her) // Illustrator
This year marks the retirement of Capilano University’s own Mr Watersburg. A curious chemistry teacher with a love and passion for all things unrelated. With his unique approach to ‘teaching’ and intense discomforting glare, he left lasting impressions on everyone he taught.
His intriguing and lengthy stories covered most of the lecture dates, failing those who lost focus from his tales. “My stories are littered with science. Everything has science,” he’d say. “Look around,” he used to say, grabbing your belongings and throwing them to the floor, “How’s that science for you?” Mr Watersburg would pick up your textbook and rip out a page or two, muttering, “That’s got to be physics, I think. Doesn’t matter.”
With his dismissal of the periodic table (due to a general distrust of others), his teachings used his own evidence displays with his own findings. Most notably The Watersburg Circle, a circular globe-type 3D model which included 3/4ths of the periodic table as well as some decorative bird illustrations. Not included in the Circle were ‘unknown properties,’ Watersburg often explained that he did, in fact, know the properties. He just didn’t know them, you know?
His abstract approach to teaching went beyond the lecture hall and bled into the stage with his production of The Phantom of The Opera, which he starred and directed. With all stagehands, techs and crew being students of CHEM 198. “I think he said it was an exploration of gravity,” said the assistant stage manager, “We were just happy for the credits.”
His collaborative efforts never went unnoticed, as stated by his many previous teaching assistants. “He had a certain way of incorporating and involving others into his antics,” said Mr. L, a former Watersburg TA (teaching assistant), “The guy before me got his arm lit on fire. Just out of nowhere. Watersburg didn’t like that he was walking around during his lecture so he grabbed a bunsen burner and you know the rest. He said he wanted to prove, scientifically, that man was capable of anything.”
His efforts at CapU will never ever be forgotten. He was an inspiration to some and a spectacle to many. Mr. Watersburg was asked to comment on his teaching legacy. Though enraged, he had this to say: “Any teaching was unintentional,” the humble professor stated, “I just wanted to rule the world. Hey, are you going to eat that?”